Bye

I would like to kiss you bye

I rather you become my long distance lust

I may or may not see you in 8 months

But you are nothing but a manipulative monster

that I have let grow inside me so big

You are way worst than the parasite of that anthropologist

You have got me enter myself so many times

That I have become so numb to it

Till I shall see you or not

I kiss you bye

I much rather go check my lottery ticket

CZ

سحرخیز باش!

چه زیبا گفت آن یگانه مرد که اکنون آزاد شده است. چه زیبا گفت از لذت بردن و خوش بودن، حتی در سخت ترین شرایط. حتی با دنده ی شکسته، بسکتبال کوچک بازی کردن.

اگر زندان تو برایت زندان نشد، نباید که زندان توهم من برایم زندان شود. اگر در آن واقعیت تو نباختی، هرگز نمی خواهم به هیچ ببازم.

باشد که من و همه خوشدل و دلخوش و مومن باشیم. ایمان به معنی فلسفی اش، نه به معنی ظاهریش. ایمان به معنی عمیقش، مثل معنی سطحیش. ایمان حتی از نوع سطحی اش، به شرط به یاد عمق بودنش.

پرودگارا آنگه که خاموش گشته ایم و از خود دور افتاده ایم، تو با ما باش. آنگه که تنها گشته ایم، تو ما را سحرخیز کن.

مثل آن دوران دور، که با تو گفتیم:

باش که امشب سحرم هوش باد

هرچه نیاد تو فراموش باد

Condor

Condor is sometimes so unusual to find that finding it is like a miracle

One's life must be logical, reasonable.

Repeating the same wrong experiences can result in opportunities being taken away.

Old Guru

Me: One's life must have balance

Old Guru: These are pieces of a line, not two sides of the scale.

But above all, one should have condor. Guru: Even at the cost of sounding too simple.

One more point to remember

“Addicts tend to minimize the potential risk,” Dr. Haltzman said. “They tend to rationalize their aberrant behavior and seem to think that they’re the exception to the rule.”

Public Prayer

Dear Lord (now I don't care to call you by what name),

I'm missing you a lot. I feel I'm not thinking of you enough in my life. Come back to me, show me, in a new format.

Or maybe you're here already. Maybe my eyes can't see you. Or maybe they can, they just don't know how to interpret you. It's like sometimes you're like a romantic life, where one has to interpret it in a certain way to make it work, to make it "feel" (Gosh I used to have so much issues with this "feeling" when I met that New Age dude... and the Suphies perhaps).

You know, it's time for all this bs to pass by. It's time to go through. Or maybe it's time for a fresh start. Maybe not. I don't know. It's funny, sometimes I don't even know what to ask. I don't even know if I should ask anything. Perhaps the concept of my asking has changed...

But I ask you, deep silence. I ask your presence. I ask your presence in form of silence. So I shall be silent.

Reaching to my Emotional Side

The Cause for Pain

Your body releases a slew of hormones, neurotransmitters and steroids during and after. From oxytocin in the pituitary-adrenal-testicular axis to DHEA in the androgen hormones, the body produces and releases hormones and steroids to maintain an [], power your drive and relax your muscles. After, the muscles in your body experience wear and tear. To combat the damage, the body releases prostaglandin E2, an anti-inflammatory hormone designed to relax the muscles. Each time you engage, the body releases the chemical. When you experience high levels of prostaglandin E2 and low levels of necessary neurochemicals, the body experiences the opposite effect: inflammation.

Similar to giving a plant too much water, the body with too much prostaglandin E2 proves harmful. The elevation of prostaglandin E2 causes cellular damage in brain cells and parasympathetic nerves. Meanwhile, low levels of dopamine, acetylcholine, serotonin and GABA, mixed with low levels of DHT, leads to sexual dysfunctions, including loss in pleasure, weak erectile capacity, reduced blood flow to the penis and back pains.

Working Too Hard

I thought I'd go crazy if I work too hard

Now I just think it's just my nature I should change

and I'm a human, so I'll change it

and I'll become more cool and relax

more tame, perhaps